Thanks Mr. Prez....

I am not one to get into politics on here. Let's just say I don't really appreciate our current president. I appreciate him even less after losing 20 minutes of my morning sitting on an exit ramp of the interstate so he could have a nice clear road to go give his graduation speech at the Air Force Academy today.

Maternity in the late 60's

Many years ago when my parents moved out of my childhood home I received boxes full of random stuff. I pulled out once such box the other day and found some things my mother had kept after having my brothers in 1968 and 1969. Click on images to read.



I also found the Hospital's Maternity booklet. Here are some sample pages


My favorite parts are about the father not being allowed in the delivery room and about refraining from sex for the last 2 months. Why?

Lauren Cuteness

Two things....

Last night before bed we were talking about being cute - she said she wasn't cute so Luke started to name other people and ask her if they were cute. After a few people Luke asked her if her friend Tori was cute she said "Tori is Definitely cute!" We hadn't used the word definitely in the conversation at all. She said it really well too - it was very funny.

Lately when I sing "Twinkle Twinkle" to her at the very end she corrects me - "No! What CHOO are!" I then explain what "What you are" means and why that way is correct and she just says "No! What CHOO are!" and I give up.

Top 5 80's Glam Rock Power Ballads

In my humble opinion of course - as a teenager in the 80's. I listened to #1 on my iPod last night on the way home from choir practice and this list came to mind.

5. Carrie - Europe I had the sheet music to this and played it on the piano.
4. Love Song - Tesla
3. Patience - Guns N' Roses
2. Silent Lucidity - Queensryche
1. Don't Know What You've Got ('Til It's Gone)- Cinderella

Sesame Street sketch

Lauren and I caught a little Sesame Street today. They did a very clever spoof on "Deal or No Deal". I don't watch the show - but I have caught pieces of it in passing.

It was "Meal or no meal". The muppet contestant had chosen a covered dish with a number. The question was if there was a meal inside the dish or not. There was a Howie Mandel muppet look-a-like. The pretty blond muppet opened the first dish the contestant did not pick and it was bubble gum ...not a meal. Then the "baker" instead of "banker" called up. The baker was cookie monster. He offered one cookie. She said "no meal" and went on. The baker continued to offer he more junk food which she declined and she kept uncovering junk food in her unpicked dishes. She took none of the yummy deals and finally uncovered her chosen dish - which was a healthy meal and it was then described for the kids.

It ended with cookie monster eating all the cookies.

Dance Recital

Hard

This morning as I sat in the choir loft getting ready to sing th introit I looked at he bulletin and saw we were about to sin "Joyful, Joyful, We Adore Thee". I USED to love singing it but it was Nathan's favorite hymn and we sang it at his funeral and so it is now hard to sing. I was definitely teary while singing it but did OK. The only thing is that they broadcast the services over the web and then zoom right in our faces us as we sing. So - I am hoping I didn't get zoomed in on this morning. I am sure people might wonder why such a Joyful song would have someone in tears. Oh well.

Craziness

I just participated in the mayhem and madness of a dance dress rehearsal with six classes of kids, 2 dances per class and only one of the classes are 6 and older. I am helping out in Lauren's class. She is the youngest. In addition to the dress rehearsal there were pictures of all the classes and individual girls. Imagine getting 10 2 and 3 year olds to look at the camera at the same time and then 2 costumes and 2 classes of this age. Repeat with 3 classes of 4-6 year olds. I assume the older girls we easy at least.

We left before the group picture of Julia's class for the tap costume. I gave them ice cream and put them to bed. I am having a drink now...

pictures coming soon

Julia's music program

It's what day tomorrow?

We're pretty much ignoring Mother's Day. We've never been too interested in the made up holidays to begin with and so this is no exception.

At our grief group on Monday we talked about it some. I said last year it was pretty hard because I knew it was the last Mother's day with Nathan. That was heartwrenching - especially the party in his classroom. This is a picture from that day. Here is the post about it. Interesting to see I wasn't willing to put that it was the last Mother's Day with him. I knew it was but I kept a lot of that to myself because I guess I felt it would be rude to actually put it in black and white - so I tiptoed around it with maybes. It really was the beginning of his decline as well.

We ended up having a good Mother's Day. Since I knew that time was running out for Nathan to have good days where he had a lot of physical activity I chose for us to make a (last) trip to Santa's Workshop. We had Nathan sit in the double stroller with Lauren so he didn't have to walk around. He rode all the rides and had a great time.

Here we are in 2006 on Mother's Day after church.

So...it is Mother's Day tomorrow and I just don't care anymore. At choir rehearsal we could call our mothers and we sang a song for them. A new member cried throughout - I don't know her story - I am assuming she lost her mother. These holidays just cause pain for those whose family situations don't fit the "ideal".

Bedtime habit

I watch TV to go to sleep every night. I know it isn't ideal for Luke (not that he has ever complained!) so last night I did not turn on the TV because we had just come upstairs from watching ER for the last hour. We chatted off and on and then he got sleepy and I was still wide awake plus I started getting flashes of the images of Nathan lying dead on an air mattress on our bedroom floor while we waited for the girls and my parents to get home so they could say their goodbyes and then while we waited for the people to come pick up his body.

So..I turned on the TV and watched until I fell asleep (and then woke up soon after and turned it off). I'll guess I'll try again in the future but for now the TV is going to have to stay on.

Flashback

I was just reading about a little boy with Neuroblastoma and his first ambulance ride and I got a flashback to one of Nathan's ambulance rides. He had just finished an abdominal surgery. He was bloated and pale and generally very scary looking. He was intubated and being bagged. There was no ICU at the hospital where he had his surgery and so they had to transfer him across the street. So - a whole slew of people walked his stretcher down the corridors and out the FRONT DOOR of the hospital. They are still bagging Nathan to breathe for him. So - he just got out of surgery, not breathing by himself and we are just standing on the dirty sidewalk in the middle of Manhattan on a very busy street where hoards of people are waiting for the bus and walking by. The ambulance rolled up and they put him in and were off for the one block ride. It was very surreal and just seemed to be "not right".

Hopefully that memory will just return to the recesses of my mind again.

Please keep Max and his family in your prayers.

April Pictures